Whether you are new to any kind of therapy or support groups or deep in your practice, here you can arrive, breathe, and be met.
The intention of the Men’s Work is to offer a space to both witness other men in their journey and to be witnessed by men who are present and willing to offer their attention. Your vulnerability, your strength, your goodness, your struggle, your kindness, your needs, your heart, your suffering, your humanity. All welcome and encouraged.
My role as facilitator is not to lead or to ‘do therapy’ with the men in these spaces. I arrive as a participant who just so happens to have started these particular gatherings and can hold the room and format for the group. It was long into my own healing that I began working with my masculinity, my sense of what it means to be a man, a father, a husband, and these connections and practices have been a place for vulnerability and learning for myself as well.
There are two options on offer:
Men’s Circle
Walking Talking Men
For further information or to sign up email me directly or text “INFO”.
Men’s Circle
Men’s Circle is a more committed and reflective space for men to gather and dive a bit deeper into their process, their connection, their engagement both in sharing and receiving. The Circle is an open group and all are welcome to join no matter what is going on in your life.
We meet at PLACE on the TIME/DATE and the cost is $20 to cover space fees - we will start with a meditation, grounding, arrival practice for a few minutes to shake off the day and get into the room. While the format will vary week to week, generally we will start with a brief prompt and go around the Circle with a check in.
After that we may focus on a particular man who needs some space/time/support, or we may dive deeper into a particular topic and see what arises. There will likely be a Kava serving at some point during the ceremony which is a nice break to shift the energy a bit. Kava is a mild, mood-elevating root beverage with effects similar to green tea. Maybe two green teas! Towards the end of our time, we will do a closing ritual to complete the gathering and return to our everyday world.
All that is needed of you is to be to the Circle on time, do your best to stay present, share if you feel ready, and receive the shares of your peers with open ears/mind/heart.
Walking Talking Men
Walking Talking Men is a nationwide, grassroots group that is committed to offering a free and regular meeting space for men to take a walk together. That’s it! Just arrive, be ready to walk for an hour, and we will take it from there.
We meet at PLACE on the TIME/DATE and the cost is Free - take a few minutes to organize and break into pairs, then head out for a walk where the discussion is between you and your partner.
Walking Talking Men is not therapy, coaching, or men’s work.
There are no fees or costs. We’re not recruiting for any organization.
No one is the expert. Each man is the expert on his own life.
No level of regular participation is required.
Each walk is owned by the men of that walk and sets its own rules, though we broadly suggest each walk consider the following:
No politics
Be yourself
Respect confidentiality
Guidelines & Agreements
Confidentiality — What is shared in Circle stays in Circle. The stories, struggles, and revelations of your brothers are not yours to carry outside this space. Honor that trust absolutely.
Talking Stick — Every man is given uninterrupted time to speak. This is not a space for advice or fixing — it is a space for reflection, honest sharing, and speaking from your own experience. When another man holds the stick, your role is to receive him fully.
Witness and Be Witnessed — One of the greatest gifts we can offer another man is our full, unhurried attention. Allow yourself to be seen, and offer that same quality of presence to your brothers. Neither minimize what you share nor what you receive.
Active Listening — Listen to understand, not to respond. Put aside the urge to problem-solve, compare, or redirect. What a man shares deserves your full presence, not half your attention while you prepare what you'll say next.
I Statements — Speak from your own story and your own experience. Use "I feel," "I notice," "I have experienced" rather than generalizing or speaking for others. Your truth is enough.
No Cross-Talk — When a man is sharing, hold the space in silence. Reactions, commentary, and responses wait until he is finished and the stick has moved. Crosstalk, even when well-intentioned, disrupts the container.
What Happens Here, Stays Here — What Leaves Here, Changes Everything — This is an extension of confidentiality and an acknowledgement of what we take with us. The details stay, but the growth, the insight, and the healing are yours to take into the world.
Respect the Container — Arrive on time, silence your phone, and bring your full self. The circle is only as strong as each man's commitment to it.
Emotions Are Welcome — Grief, anger, fear, joy, all belong here. There is no hierarchy of acceptable feeling. A man need not hold it together in this space.
Right to Pass — No man is ever required to share. Passing the stick without speaking is always honored, without question or comment.
Meet Each Man Where He Is — Come without expectation of where a brother should be in his journey. A man may arrive broken, guarded, euphoric, or numb. None of these are wrong. Our role is not to move him along but to receive him exactly as he arrives.
Honor the Man Who Showed Up Today — The version of masculinity that walks through the door tonight is the right one. A man may show up soft or hard, open or closed, warrior or wounded. Every expression is welcome here. We do not ask a man to perform strength he doesn't have, nor apologize for the strength he does.
☎ CONTACT
hoctorlmft@gmail.com
415-949-0649➤ LOCATIONS
California, Nevada, and Washington State
Virtual sessions only.